I'm crying and i dont know why... perhaps it is simply b/c it's that time of the month, but i really believe there is more... i fear God's anger with me, like the fear of a dad after deliberate disobedience. then i want his presece soo badly i crave a tangible touch so much that it breaks my heart. then i read part of the shack and start crying again about man's judgment of God and His judgment of love for us.... then to top it all off i still fear losing my mom, no i dread with my whole being that she will be taken from me.... im a wreck, a horrible wreck, with no explaination as to the real reason why... so i sit here at 2:37 am and cry and type... what does it all mean? i long for a hand to wipe away my tears, to say something that makes sense, and to comfort me with rubbing my back or stroking my hair... i want Him to be tangible... o i want Him to be rangible soooo much i ache... so i'll head to bed and pray that He'll come and give me what i so greaty desire... and let me know what it is while He's at it